Choosing My Heart, Fixing My Mind
by Amaya formerly Yuki Ona
Summary: **NEW CHAPTER**Hermione finds out a disturbing secret about Ginny. What will happen when she confronts her friend?
1. The Picture

AN: Howdy Ya'll! This is mah first actual fanfic ive ever written. Wish me luck and PLEASE REVIEW!!!!! Ive written some stuff on fiction press with Kasagi Onaso(Fanfiction)/Fire-eyed aries(fiction press)(same person). Please read our story DreamGate: Element under the penname Yuki Ona! REVIEW THAT TOO! Im co-writing this with mah bud emmy. She don't have a user name here her loss lol. Well, here i go!

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER OR NETHING THAT'S WARNER BROS.! PLEASE DON'T SUE ME IM FRIGGIN BROKE! AND I DON'T PARTICULARLY LIKE FLAME MAIL!

            Hermione awoke with a start. What the hell had she just been dreaming about? It sure as heck wasn't one of her normal dreams (which mostly consisted of Harry). Could that have been...? Yes, she was sure now. But really! Ginny Weasly? Her jaw dropped slightly in horror as she recalled the rest of the dream. 

            "No, no! That can't be! Can't!" Hermione found herself expressing her shock aloud. She wasn't really like that, was she? Hmm... She wasn't sure. As she ran all that had happened through her head, the wakefulness charm she'd been using wore off. Hermione drifted off into a blissfully dreamless sleep.

*****

            As Hermione rose out of bed to change into her uniform, her very perceptive eyes caught a glimpse of something shiny in Ginny's bunk. Ever since Ginny had been moved up a year due to a freak accident involving an intelligence potion, she had been just as smart as Hermione. Which also meant she got to move up to the 7th year's dormitory. Hermione wasn't sure she liked having someone to compete with in class, but Ginny was a great friend to have as a roommate. Hermione walked slowly over to Ginny's bedside table. Her natural curiosity had been enhanced by her excursions with Harry, whom she was now dating, and Ron, her best male friend. She approached Ginny's bed with the least amount of caution possible for her. She reached over and pulled the shiny thing out of the drawer. She almost collapsed in horror.

            "OH MY GOD! NO, NO, NO! THIS ISN'T HAPPENING! I'M NOT SEEING THIS!" But she knew it was true. What she'd pulled out of the drawer was a silver picture frame. Inside the picture frame was a picture. _A picture of_ _her. Of her, Hermione. On the glass was a message written in black Permo-write, a writing spell that ensures the message written can't be removed, even by magic. The message said, plain as the freckles on Hermione's nose: _My only love, Hermione. Property of Ginny Weasly._ Hermione somehow knew that Ginny was a lesbian, but liking _her_? That was a completely different story!_

            "I mustn't tell anyone," Hermione thought aloud. She knew that if anyone found out, the two of them would be scorned for their last year of Hogwarts. Ron and Harry would probably never speak to them again. Neither of them could live with that.

            Hermione tucked the picture deep into the drawer. She would keep this a secret, until she had a chance to talk with Ginny. She sat down on her bed, trying to make herself believe it, but she couldn't. She would never be like Ginny. 

            Or so she thought.

AN: sorry so short! More to come soon, u can count on it! REVIEWS PLEASE!!!


	2. Uh, Hi, Ginny

"Hey Hermione!" Ginny shouted to her friend.  
"Uh, hey Ginny," Hermione said awkwardly. "Study for the Potions exam?"  
"Oh, uh, yeah." The redhead said. She was wondering why Hermione was acting so.awkwardly. She couldn't know could she?  
"Ginny what's wrong?" Hermione asked, surprising herself at how concerned she felt for her friend.  
"Well.I like someone a lot and I know if I told them, everyone would hate me! It's so confusing!" Ginny confessed. She hoped Hermione found out who it was.and felt the same for her.  
"Who is it Ginny? You know you can tell me." Hermione said, even though she knew that it was she.  
"Some boy in my Transfiguration class." Ginny said quickly.  
"Oh." Hermione said shortly. She couldn't figure out why she felt so disappointed at those words. But she KNEW Ginny liked her, right? I mean, she saw the picture. That was proof. The goddamn picture said "My only love, Hermione. Property of Ginny Weasly." Oh! She thought What am I to do? I love Harry! I'm not a lesbian. I can't be.I can't love Ginny. It's not right for girls to love other girls! It's not RIGHT damn it!  
"Hermione?" Ginny asked softly. "Are you OK?" She had seen the odd look on the older girl's face.  
"Fine." Said Hermione as she quickly changed the topic. "So are you going to the quidditch game today?"  
"Yeah, I am, are you?" Ginny replied, trying to make her voice sound nonchalant.  
"No, I was going to try and get some studying done for the finals." Hermione replied. She hopes her plan will work. If Ginny would just ask to come they would be alone and Hermione could confront her.  
"I should study too. Would you mind if I came?" Ginny said. She hoped Hermione wouldn't mind, they would be alone together.  
Yes! Hermione silently thought to herself. "Not at all!" she said.  
"OK, I'll meet you in the library after I change." Ginny said. She had come down to breakfast in her robe and slippers.  
"Right." The girl replied. She couldn't help but feel slightly excited that her and Ginny would have the chance to be alone.  
  
A/N Hey! This is Emily.I'm co-writing this with Jenna, please review! More chapters soon to come!!! We'll add chapters pretty often.so check back a lot! Well, thanks for reading! PLEASE REVIEW!! 


	3. Confronting Harry

AN: this is Yuki again! Let me remind you to go read me and Kasagi Onaso/Fire-Eyed Aries fiction on FictionPress.net . it's called DreamGate: Element. Search for it by the penname Yuki Ona. My co-writer for this story has a name on here though! She just got one. Its QueenEmily. Thanx ya'll ttyl

DISCLAIMER:  I DON'T OWN HARRY POTTER OR ANY OF ITS CHARACTERS BLAHDEBLAHDEBLAH...........

Hermione steadily walked down the stairs of the girl's dormitory towards the common room.  Because of her arrangement to meet Ginny in the library, she wanted to get all her facts and feelings straight. 

"Harry, are you down there?"

"Yeah Herm. Hey, want to help me cram for potions?" Harry had never been the one to make sensitive comments just because she was his girlfriend. He treated her the same as everyone else, except when he had a reason. Now was not a time he had a reason, unfortunately.

"Not right now, Harry. I just want to talk, is all."

"Well, come down then! I'm not going to yell up at you the whole time!"

"Alright, alright. I'm coming." Hermione jogged down the stairs, hoping that Harry was alone. He was.

"What do you want to talk about, Herm?"

"Okay, Harry, this might seem a bit brash, but do you love me?"

"Uh, um, wow, Herm," Harry's face flushed a little at the suddenness of Hermione's statement. "I've never really thought about it much, but, um, yeah, I guess I do."

"Look at me, Harry. Into my eyes. What do you see?"

"What are you trying to pull, some divination stunt?"

"Oh, come on, Harry, you know I have better things to do than to waste my time in 'Professor' Trelawney's class!" One of the portraits with a crystal ball growled at Hermione. She paid no notice. "What do you see?"

"Uh... I see the most beautiful girl in the world. The only girl I'm ever likely to be in love with. Ever."

"And you're not just saying that?"

"I'm not just saying that."

Hermione was shocked. Something just wasn't clicking. Could she really be...? She put Ginny's face in her mind and replayed the present scene with Ginny instead of Harry.

'I see the most beautiful girl in the world. The only girl I'm ever likely to be in love with. Ever.' This made Hermione blush. She felt _good. So good it was scaring her. The same way she felt with Harry. But now that she thought about it..._

Hermione gasped. She found the words "used to feel with Harry" running through her mind. No, no! It couldn't be! She wasn't like that! As if from a distance, Hermione heard Harry talking to her.

"Herm? Herm, are you okay? Hermione?" But his voice faded away as Hermione dashed up the stairs to her dorm. Harry was unnerved at the heavy, choking sobs coming from her room.

Hermione was shocked at her sudden outburst. 

"God, Harry must think I hate him. How thick could I be?" she thought. "But I have a reason. It's not my fault I'm… I'm…" She started crying again, still unbelieving of her own thoughts. Her heart was telling her that this was right, but all the same her head was screaming at her that this was wrong and she was committing some sort of heinous act of rebellion. Her feelings towards Ginny were tearing her apart from the inside. But then she realized something.

"I'm not the only one who's going to be in trouble." For even though she would have to tell Harry about her feelings for Ginny, Ginny herself would have to tell _Ron. Hermione didn't fancy being the one to break the news to Ginny's overprotective older brother, and Hermione's good friend._

"Wow. I guess we're both screwed." This made her laugh, and strangely enough, she felt more confident about seeing Ginny in the library. She spent the rest of the afternoon reading in her bed.


	4. The Journey to the Library

DISCLAIMER: Don't own any of this stuff, you should know that by now.  
  
"Hermione? What do you mean? What are you talking about?" Hermione jumped. She hadn't thought of the possibility of any of the other girls were in the dormitory. She reddened as Lavender Brown peeked through the curtains around her bed.  
  
"Nothing. Nothing to worry about Lavender." Hermione stuttered. "Listen, I'm not trying to be rude, but can you leave me alone?"  
  
Lavender was obviously offended because she threw the curtains messily back together and clomped down the stairs ad out of the common room. Only once Hermione heard the portrait of the fat lady swing close did she remember she was supposed to be at the library, meeting Ginny.  
  
Hermione ran through the common room and out the portrait hole. As she ran down the corridor she was aware of someone following her closely. She stopped abruptly and spun around. The person behind hadn't stopped soon enough and Hermione's head collided with his nose.  
  
"Ouch! Hermione! What'd you do that for?" A familiar voice yelled. "HARRY?! What are you doing following me? Oh, Harry! Your nose is bleeding! Do you want me to take you to the hospital wing?"  
  
After Hermione had gotten Harry to the hospital wing and told him she'd be back to visit him tomorrow, she headed to the library. She was going as fast as she could without walking, her being a prefect and everything; she couldn't get caught running down deserted corridors. She was more than a little nervous about this meeting with Ginny. How good of an impression could she make being an hour late? She was so caught up in her own thoughts that she didn't see Ron coming down the hall.  
  
"Hermione! Where're you going?" Ron asked. "Uh, to, um, the library." She stuttered. "What for? Studying? Finals aren't for weeks, you're crazy!" "No, no, not finals, I'm, uh, meeting someone." Hermione blushed and was thankful that the corridors weren't very well lit at night. "HERMIONE! You have a boyfriend already! I'm telling Harry!" Ron shouted. "Quiet, Ron, keep it down! It's ok! It's not what you think! It's only Ginny!" Hermione clapped a hand over her mouth as Ron let out a high, girlish scream. "GINNY?!.Sister.Hermione.ew." he muttered  
  
Hermione really wanted to explain to Ron but she was now an hour and fifteen minutes late and Ron had become incapable of more than one word at a time. "Ron, listen I really have to go. Just go back to Gryffindor Tower. Maybe visit Harry in the hospital wing. Just go!" "Harry's in the hospital wing? Why?" Ron asked, suddenly coming back to his senses. "Well, er, I think I might have broken his nose." Hermione said, quite embarrassed. "Hermione! What has gotten into you? I mean, my sister, she's uh, well, we all knew. But you? I never thought. I'm sorry, I need to go sort this all out, maybe have a talk with Ginny." "Ron, don't. She loves me and.I.I think I love her back." Hermione whispered and with one look at Ron's face, fled.  
  
Hermione was unnerved by the quiet sobs coming from the corner of the room. As she approached she saw the tangle of red hair and heard a few words being choked out from Ginny's small mouth. "Stood up.horrible.hate.love.thought."  
  
"Ginny? Ginny, I'm here, I'm so, so sorry!" Hermione whispered. "Hermione?" Ginny asked softly, looking up at the older girl with her tear-streaked face. "Hermione?" "Yes, yes, I'm here. I'm really sorry, Ginny. I was angry with Harry and he started following me on my way here and I accidentally hit his nose might e broken. Then I was almost here and I ran into Ron. He knows now, he's a little angry, more confused I guess. Anyways, I'm here now." Hermione explained and sat down next to the girl.  
  
"So, um, Ron knows what?" Ginny asked, careful to keep her voice down so the librarian didn't overhear.  
  
"Oh my!" Hermione squeaked as she noticed what time it was. "Ginny, we only have 7 minutes to get back to Gryffindor Tower or we'll be in huge trouble with McGonagall. We'd better go! Come on!" And with that, Hermione pulled Ginny to her feet and the two of them ran all the way to Gryffindor Tower, Hermione would rather be caught running than be out of bed at this hour.  
  
A/N: It's a little longer than the rest of the other chapters. BTW this is Emily. Please review!! Byez! 


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